Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: BtVS characters belong to Joss Whedon. (bless him)
Feedback: Hit me (Love tap!)
Distribution: Yes, please. Lemme know?
Dedication: To Mac, for giving me an idea from her fabulous fic "Showgirls" ; and to all the wonderful people who gave me feedback after reading my stories on AFF, and asking where they went to when they suddenly disappeared. Because of your kind words, I decided to keep writing. So thank you, all of you, from the bottom of my heart. xoxo.
Summary: Buffy is blinded by love. I mean, really blinded.

-Oralfxatn

Blind Spot

BUFFY'S POV:

There she goes again.

So why am I not surprised? Because she does this every time.

And I'm sick of it.

I watch her as she quickly puts on her clothing, stopping for a moment to scratch herself...there.

She's so crude. I don't know what I see in her.

She bends over for a moment to pick up the silver lighter that has fallen onto the floor.

Oh, right...that's what.

I sigh as she straightens back up, turning her gorgeous butt away from me. She pulls on her top, bra-less, and then runs some quick fingers through her hair. She looks at me.

"What?" she asks.

Like always.

"Nothing." I answer.

Like always.

Because that's how she wants it. No ties, no tears, no obligations.

Free and easy. Just like her.

No ball and chain, no leash, no noose around the neck.

So basically, no me.

I tried a few times to end it with her.

I mean, not that we had 'anything' to end, according to her, but I tried to walk away from the situation. I always came back.

And she was always so grateful when I did.

Very grateful.

I even left a few times just to make her get that way.

I know, I know, it's a 'womanly wile' or a 'pussy ploy' or a 'mega manipulation', but she always seemed to pay more attention to me after I did.

So I did.

It's not very creative, withholding sex from your lover, but a woman has got to go with what works.

And withholding sex from Faith works every time.

Like a charm.

But eventually, like after a week or two, she'd get all distant and detached again. And again, she'd leave as soon as we were done making love.

I'm sorry. I mean 'banging'.

I really don't know what I see in her.

She slides up to me on the bed, smiling that sexy smile, and presses her toned clothed body against mine.

Well, my naked body, that is. There's only a sheet in between us.

She kisses me softly on the lips and then smiles, raising an eyebrow. She looks down at the sheet that's covering me and uses the crook of her finger to pull it away.

I watch her eyelids lower as she gazes down at my breasts. She lets out a groan and then covers me back up.

"Later, baby." she murmurs, nuzzling my neck. She moves up higher and whispers in my ear.

"I'll make you real happy tonight."

I want to tell her no, to go fuck herself and to take that 'happy' and shove it up her ass.

But I don't.

"Okay." I whisper, instead.

She smiles softly at me before slipping into a cocky grin.

"Love ya, B." With a peck on the lips. And then she's out the door.

Like I said, I'm used to this.

These 'nooner's' or 'dine and dash' afternoons, as she likes to call them.

"I feel like eatin some lunch at the 'Y', B. How about you?"

She's so romantic. I really don't know what I see in her.

And a 'freaky-deeky' in the middle of the day is one thing, but her leaving me in the middle of the night is another.

I'll never get used to that.

When we had first started, she couldn't get enough of me.

She'd wrap herself tight around my body and hold me until I fell asleep.

And I would wake up in her arms the same way.

Fingers tangled in my hair, her leg draped possessively between mine.

It was nice. Somewhat suffocating, but nice.

I'd sometimes wish she'd give me more room to breathe, let me move around a little, not be so close all the time...

...be careful what you wish for, ladies.

Sometimes I couldn't even get up for the bathroom without a struggle.

"No." she'd protest, holding me tighter.

"Pee." I'd explain, my fingers prying at her arms.

"You may have a urinary infection, B. You always have to piss in the morning."

And then she'd go down on me to see if she was right.

Which, of course, she knew that she wasn't.

But I really don't think that would have stopped her anyway.

Not then.

Not at that time.

Afterwards she'd look up at me, grinning, and rub her nose against my pubic hair.

"Guess I was wrong, B. Everything checks out okay. But isn't it better when you gotta take a leak, anyway?" It's true. A full bladder does seem to make it more intense.

Then she would follow me into the bathroom and grope me the entire way. On the way there, on the pot, washing my hands, and on the way back.

Once we were back in the bedroom, I was all over her.

She knows which buttons to push. She knows my hot spots. And she knew just how to play them until I was out of my mind with desire for her.

Which doesn't take much, actually. She knew just how to exploit that fact and take me over the edge...

...then.

I get up sighing.

Another day, another few hours alone with Faith.

Until tonight.

Tonight she'll stay longer, maybe even doze off for a bit, while I...

...well, I will hold myself completely still trying my best not to wake her.

I'll stare at her, watching her every movement...watching for an indication or some sort of sign that she's either awake or will wake up soon or how deep she's in REM sleep.

In other words, gaging how much longer I had with her.

I have dark circles under my eyes these days.

Not very attractive...and that really doesn't help my self-confidence, either.

So I'm pretty much fucked all the way around.

Willow and Xander tried to tell me that she wasn't worth it. But I'd just sigh and nod my head.

I know, I know...it's not healthy.

"Buffy, we care about you, that's all we're saying." Willow would explain.

But what she was really trying to say was that Faith didn't.

But she does. I know she does.

You can tell by the look in her eyes or the smile on her face.

"I don't know, Buffy. I don't see it."

"Neither do I." said Xander.

Well, I do.

Okay, not so much now, but she really did then.

Then...

...when she couldn't get enough of me.

I walk into the bathroom and run the water in Faith's rust-stained tub.

Yeah, that's where I am. At her place. She leaves me alone while she goes 'out and about'.

"Dang, B. Save some for later. I'm not going anywhere." she'd say, as she'd head out the door.

Yeah, I could see that.

But the reason I don't leave when she does, is because sometimes she comes back when I'm still here.

Okay, not so much now, but she used to.

Like last week, even...or was it the week before?

I can't remember, but she came back when I was in the bathtub and she had decided to join me.

We had laughed and made love -I refuse to believe it was 'banging'- washing each other's hair, shaving each other's legs, just staying in the water until we both were wrinkled.

We had such a great time...and, yes, we were making love. I'm sure of it.

I'm sure of it.

Anyway, we had sex in the tub, got out and had sex again, ordered food, ate, and then had sex again. We slept for a while, woke up and then had sex two more times.

I know it was irresponsible of me to let the gang patrol alone, but this kind of opportunity didn't come up that often.

Hardly ever, in fact, so when it did, I jumped all over it.

"Damn baby, is it my birthday or something?" she had asked.

"No." I remember saying, confused.

"I'm kidding, B. It's just that you're treating me extra special, so it kinda feels like it."

I know she was referring to our earlier days. When she couldn't get enough of me, but I could of her.

I mean, sex twice a week was enough for me, and occasionally, sometimes, a third. It was all I could really handle at the time.

After our 'honeymoon' stage of course. I mean, everyone has a 'honeymoon' stage.

Anyway, she was like a bottomless cup of coffee. I knew there would always be more if I wanted some. I didn't see the need to have it constantly or all at once.

I'm such an idiot.

The cup has gone dry and now I find myself licking the bottom for more.

"Maybe it was the challenge." offered Xander.

"Or maybe it was the newness." said Willow.

I complain to them all the time. Something my two best friends had to make some serious adjustments to.

Not only was I involved sexually with a woman, but I told them all about it.

In detail.

Xander has no problem with it, heck, he lives for it, but Willow...well, we all know Willow.

She was surprised by my complete and utter frankness about it all.

"Umm...Buffy, we get that you're into her, but...umm...do you have to DESCRIBE exactly how much?"

"Oh, hell yeah." said Xander, grinning. Then he got a serious look on his face.

"Uh, I mean, the better to help her with, Willow. Color me Dr. Ruth."

And lately I've been seeing a lot more of Xander than I'm used to.

He always has a hard-on.

But since I was basically exposing myself to him, I figured I shouldn't complain.

At least he keeps it zipped up and doesn't expose himself to me.

And Willow, god bless her, tried to be of assistance and even went so far as to purchase 'The Joy of Lesbian Sex'. She had her nose buried in it, trying to figure out the attraction, and Xander couldn't help but comment on it.

"See, Will? You're getting the hang of it. Look where your nose is..."

And she had blushed profusely, burying her nose even deeper in it.

She would dog-ear the pages of curiousity to her and leave it for me to read.

She was wondering if we had done those things. And the answer would always be

"Yes."

Yes, and then some. I mean, come on, Faith wrote that book.

And I've contributed a few chapters of my own.

You have to, if you want to keep Faith interested.

Which apparently, I'm not. Well, I am, but she isn't.

I settle back into the tub and let the water caress my skin. It's warm and inviting, daring me to stay until she returns.

Which I have no plans of doing, by the way. I just need to clean up before I leave.

Oh, get off it, Buffy.

You're hoping she'll return. Like last week...or was it the week before?

I try to quiet my mind and let the bubblebath take me away...to a nicer time when I had the upper hand and she was the one who had waited for me.

Her surprised look is still etched in my memory. We had just returned from slaying, and yes...I was horny. She had been at me for weeks, months even, and I finally gave in.

I'm still trying to figure out if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

Anyway, she had lured me over with food and a movie.

"To help you wind down a bit, B." she explained.

When I agreed, her jaw almost hit the floor.

She hadn't expected me to say yes, of course. I never had before.

And then she practically ran us back to her motel, parking me on her bed while she straightened up quickly and then left to grab us some food and a flick.

"Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back!" she had said in a rush, as she ran out the door.

So I hung out and kept myself occupied by looking around.

She didn't have much, by means of material things, but what she had was very interesting.

A closet full of leather goods...and not just clothing. There were other things...I'll leave that to your imagination. A big stack of comic books on top of a bigger stack of nudie magazines. Knives, brass knuckles, even a small axe or two. Taken from our weapons arsenal, I'm sure.

Lipstick, dark eyeliner, some cologne. Nothing fancy, but definitely all her.

I lifted the bottle to my nose and recognized the fragrance right away.

And I got wet.

I told you I was horny. And after her constant sexual harrassment, how did you expect my body to react?

Okay, then.

But her most prized possessions were kept in a drawer by the bed.

You know what I mean.

I gasped when I saw them. And then I got hot. My face was burning and I looked around the room to see if the heater was on. But it wasn't. It was just me.

I knew she'd probably have the tools of the trade, but I had no idea how many tools she'd have.

I mean, there were a ton of tools.

Most rather interesting, some not so much.

And some kinda frightening. To me, anyway. Especially since I had no idea how or what they were used for.

But I do now, and I can honestly say they don't frighten me anymore. No, not at all.

But it did then, so I closed the drawer and sat back on the bed.

Hmm, I thought. Was I really ready for this? This complete lifestyle change and all the accoutrements that came with it?

Well, maybe not the accoutrements just yet, but I was definitely ready for her.

And then I found myself getting even wetter.

A little while later she came back with some food and some movies. Different genres; romantic comedy, horror, action, and some sexy stuff.

I looked over the titles and then looked up at her.

"What, B? Don't want to limit yourself on choices, do you?"

She handed me the food -which was pizza, by the way- and then went into the bathroom and started running the water in the tub.

"You look kinda tense, there, B. Just thought a nice hot bath would relax your weary bones."

"Oh. Well, that's thoughtful of you. What about yourself?"

She smiled slowly.

"Oh, I'm thoughtful, alright. I've been thinking about it all week."

I looked blankly at her. "Go relax in the tub, B. I'll put in a movie and keep the food hot for you."

How? By putting it between her legs? Or mine? But that wouldn't actually work, since I'd be submerged in water. Unless we were having soup.

Yeah, my mind really works like that. My babbling starts from somewhere, yunno.

So I got up and took a bath. I closed the door, cus I didn't want to make it dreadfully obvious as to why I was there. I mean, me being there alone should have told her.

No need to make a scene about it.

So I was soaking in the tub, water to my neck, when she knocks on the door.

"Yes?" I responded, heart racing.

"Uh, sorry, B, but I gotta take a leak...do you mind?"

Do I mind?

"No, go ahead." I decided I didn't.

She let herself in, avoiding eye contact. But she snuck peeks at me from the corner of her eye. So I bathed myself in front of her while she was sitting on the toilet.

Not that she really had to go or anything. I heard nothing, she just sat there, peeking at me.

"You have any bubblebath, Faith?"

"Uh, yeah, B. In fact, I do." she smiled. I wasn't expecting that answer. Faith and bubblebath?

She got up from the pot and pulled up her pants. I watched her open a cabinet and pull out a small glass bottle.

"You don't strike me as a bubblebath kind of girl." I told her, impressed.

"Oh, not so much me, personally. But some girls seem to appreciate it."

Oh.

"Uh, okay. Well, this girl appreciates it, too."

"Good." She walked over to the tub and unplugged the drain, she looked me in the eye as the water started to creep lower. Not that it mattered. The water was clear and she could see all of me anyway.

When the level lowered around my breast area, she raised an eyebrow and said

"Oops. Sorry, there, B. Looks like the twins are reacting to the temperature change."

My nipples went perky from the sudden cool air. I sank myself lower in the tub, submerging my perkiness, unwittingly making my knees spread open. Realizing this, I closed them quickly.

But not quick enough.

"Well, hello..." Faith said, looking down at it.

You know where.

"Faith, bubblebath, please. This isn't a peep show!" I snapped.

"Oh? Well, too late." Then she ran more water in the bath, adding the contents from the bottle.

Bubbles began to form and a subtle fragrance filled the small room.

"That's nice, Faith. What is it?" It really was. It smelled so expensive.

"No clue, B....it's...uh...just something I got more of after someone left a bottle here." she said, with a very small smile, avoiding my eyes.

Faith was having sex with someone who knew the difference between a box of Mr. Bubbles and a bottle of this?

In Sunnydale? Sorry, I don't mean to belittle this place, but really. And certainly not someone I figured she'd run into.

Unless it was Cordelia.

Oh fuck, Cordelia!

"Have you seen Cordy around lately? We've been seeing less and less of her these days." I asked, casually.

She smiled bigger that time.

"Hmm, really? Maybe she's been showing more and more of herself to someone else these nights."

I looked at the bottle in Faith's hand.

French. From that boutique next to April Fool's. I remember, cuz I almost bought a bottle for myself. I was shopping for Willow's birthday that week, and carried it around in my hand as I walked around the shop. I finally put it back when I couldn't justify the expense for something so completely self-indulgent.

Plus I was shopping for Willow's birthday, not myself...besides, the bottle was just dinky.

But Cordelia is nothing if not self-indulgent.

Not long after that, I discovered Faith and Cordelia were having a thing. I never really caught them, but I was right all the same.

I wanted her already, but then I wanted her even more.

"Do you take bubblebaths?" I asked Faith, coyly, with a small gleam in my eye.

"Is that an invitation?" she asked, boldly, with a huge gleam in her eye.

"Just answer the question, Faith."

"Just answer the question, Buffy."

"It's your tub."

"Damn straight." And she proceeded to peel off her clothing, looking at me.

I sank lower in the tub as I watched her...that's when I first fell in love with her ass.

It was pretty snug once she got in. Our legs became entangled and our toes would brush each other's pussies when we moved around to get more comfortable.

Finally, I let my toes creep between her legs on purpose.

"Uh...you know where your toes are, right?" she asked, eyes closed, her head resting against the shower wall.

"Uh-huh."

"Okay, just checking."

I watched her facial expression change as I ran my foot up her snatch.

Her eyes were closed and her jaw was clenched. I could see the little muscle tic where her dimple would usually be.

I saw sweat begin to bead and collect on her forehead.

"You okay, Faith?"

"Yeah, B...s'just fuckin hot in here."

"Let out some water...put in some cold."

"Don't think that's the problem, B."

"No?"

"No."

"What is?"

"Your toes up my twat."

I pulled my foot back quickly with that vulgar word, but she snapped her eyes open and grabbed my ankle.

"Where ya goin?"

"To more civilized waters." I replied, making an 'ugh' face.

"Oh. All the way over there?" she teased, as I pulled my knees up to get away from her. Well, knee, cus she still had my ankle in her hand.

"Yes, 'across the pond'." I answered, firmly.

"What about the 'great divide'?" she asked, running her foot along my snatch.

"Well, it is great, but it's not BIG." I scolded her.

"I'm sure it's not. But forgive me, B, I must have missed that history lesson."

Maybe, but her sense of geography was still pretty good.

She found my clit with very little exploring.

"Hey, wanna play Williams & Sonoma?"

"That's Lewis & Clark, fruitloop."

"Whatever, B."

After a few more moments of toe exploration she said

"Done exploring, now. I found what I'm lookin for." And she pulled my ankle up, pulling me along with it.

I sputtered when my head went under.

She put her hands under my arm pits and laughed as she pulled me up.

"Oops, sorry, B. Consider yourself baptised."

But what we did next only ensured my place in hell. Baptism or no baptism.

If you believed in that sort of thing.

Oh well...hell was good. Heaven could wait.

She pulled me onto her lap and pressed my body into hers. I wrapped my legs on both sides of her hips and let my head drop back as she nuzzled my neck. She began licking and biting softly at my sensitive skin.

She worked her teeth and tongue to my jaw and then stopped when she reached my lips. I moved my head back up and found myself staring into warm, smoky eyes.

"I'm about to kiss you, you know." she whispered.

"I know." I murmured back.

"As long as you know." And then she put her mouth on mine and she did.

Her lips were soft and firm, her tongue was amazing. My first real kiss with a woman and it was delicious and hot...steamy, even, but I could tell she was holding something back.

Something in her body told me she was restraining herself, 'curbing her enthusiasm' if you will.

But I wasn't having it.

I straightened my spine and bore down on her, raising myself higher at the same time. I held her face in my hands and lifted her head up, pushing her gently against the wall while I kissed her assertively, aggressively...hungrily.

She groaned under the onslaught of my mouth. She began to respond in kind, her tongue becoming bolder, more forceful. After minutes of this, I felt light-headed. I could barely breathe.

I pulled away, gasping.

"I don't think so, Buffy. You're not gonna crank me up just to wind me down."

And she put her hand to my head and pulled me to her again.

The trick -I figured out much later- was to let out a small whimper.

Because a whimper seems to enflame her senses. She'll pull back with a groan and bury her face in my neck...or breasts. Whichever is closer at the time.

In this case it was my breasts.

She released my lips and I straightened back up. She pulled me closer, tighter, smashing her open mouth to my breast.

Faith's mouth is like a greenhouse. It's hot and moist and I found my nipple growing hard and stiff in there. She teased it with her tongue and then skillfully sucked on it.

I let out a groan of my own.

"Oh, Faith..."

She sucked harder, nipping it with her teeth before moving to the other. I held onto her head.

"Hmmmm, Faith."

Suddenly, with swiftness and strength, she raised herself from the tub, one hand on my ass and the other gripping my leg behind her. Her mouth never let go of its prize.

Soaking wet, she took us from the hot tub and placed us on her cool sheets. She let go of my nipple and positioned her head above mine.

"You sure you want this?" she asked, eyes watchful and intent.

I raised my head and kissed her my reply.

I've never been so sure of anything in my life...

...then.

I'm sorry, I need to regroup for a moment.

Faith looking at me so deeply, so intently, listening to my breathing patterns, kissing me, stroking me...loving me...

Making me feel like I was the only person on the planet that mattered to her.

I can't sit here and do this.

I let myself out of the tub, leaving the plug in the drain. I don't care. Let her see that I waited for her. She doesn't know for how long or how often I've done it. I have no pride left, so really, who cares?

I dry myself with her blue embroidered 'Faith' towel. She uses my pink 'Buffy' one.

She had given them to me for my birthday.

But she had appeared a little hesitant after she saw all the thoughtful and personal gifts everyone else had gotten me, and was extremely reluctant to have me open the package once we got back to her motel.

And no one knew about us then. I was still a little paranoid at the time. I guess she thought everyone knew, cus she acted a little surprised when I put hers aside and whispered that I would open it later.

Willow had looked at me curiously...Giles looked away and mom had coughed into her hand.

And Xander just grabbed the box and started shaking it.

"Hmm. Seems kinda light for handcuffs and chains." he said, grinning, putting his ear close to it.

Exactly what I wanted to avoid.

I mean, with Faith, you never knew what you might be getting. No one needed to know about the change in our relationship. It was none of their business.

She just looked at me and shrugged. She understood, she didn't mind.

I sigh and head back into the room to gather my clothes. My eyes are drawn toward the ashtray by the bed. Well, not so much the ashtray, but what's next to it.

To a small round metal box with a skull and daggers etching on the cover.

It's her stash box. No, not for pot, but for little personal things. Like some of her rings, my barrettes, and some other woman's earring.

Just one. Its mate is missing.

I open the lid and take the evidence out.

Proof she's been cheating. I try to recall where I've seen it before. I've already gone through an inventory of possible girls a hundred times in my mind. But I do it again.

This time I even throw my mom and Willow into the mix.

It's like that groovy Abba song. 'Lay all Your Love on me.'

"I wasn't jealous before we met, now every woman I see is a potential threat."

I'm a little ashamed for thinking that way, about mom and Willow, I mean.

But all other females were suspect. Especially Cordelia.

While Cordy practically shuns the rest of us, she is annoyingly attentive to Faith.

"Her bullshit is less offensive than yours." Cordy had explained one day, dismissing us with a smirk.

"What can I say?" Faith grinned, taking Cordy's arm.

"Stop it, you 'tard." Cordy laughed, fending off Faith's tickling fingers as they left through the library doors.

Where they went, I don't know. But by the looks of the one earring, I suspect it was here.

Here, in this bed, in these sheets...in OUR bed and OUR sheets.

I finger the earring, looking at it.

A small emerald in a platinum setting. Cordy is a diamond girl, but you never know. Frustrated, I put it back. My eyes scan the rest of her room. Messy, but not as bad as before we got together. Which only makes me sadder when my eyes rest on her Sony Walkman.

That song that brought it all together for me.

I walk over to the bureau and slip the head phones on. I hit Play.

Use me when you want to come
I've bled just to have your touch
When I'm in you I wanna die

User friendly
fucking dopestar obscene
Will you die when you're high
You'd never die just for me

She says
"I'm not in love, but I'm gonna fuck you
'til somebody better comes along."

Use me like I was a whore
Relationships are such a bore
Deleted the ones that you've fucked

User friendly
fucking dopestar obscene
Will you die when you're high
You'd never die just for me

She says
"I'm not in love, but I'm gonna fuck you
'til somebody better comes along."

And the glutton for punishment that I am, I listen to it again.

User Friendly. Marilyn Manson.

She's just using me. Using me til someone better comes along.

Has she found them yet or is she still looking? She must still be looking, trying on other girls to see how they fit, because she's still having sex with me.

But it's less and less now. And if I know one thing, it's not because Faith is any less interested in sex, it's because she's less interested in having it with me.

I take the headphones off. I walk to her closet.

More proof.

Actually, the jacket is missing, so that's the kind of proof that I mean.

Proof-of-the-missing kind.

Her weather-worn brown leather jacket. The one I am constantly borrowing and returning. Always steeped in my perfume, making the rest of her closet smell like Faith and Buffy.

A nice combination at one time. She thought so, too. But now it's been missing for two weeks and when I ask her about it, she's always vague and shifty eyed.

She gets that way when she's lying.

"Uh, I dunno, B. You sure you returned it to me? I think you had it last."

"I'm sure, Faith."

"Oh...well, I don't know then. Maybe you should check out your closet again."

Oh, trust me, I did. In fact...

"Buffy, are you finally donating some things to Goodwill?" Mom had asked, looking at all the clothing on the floor. I was kneeling on the ground, my head buried in the closet, throwing things behind me...looking for the fifth time in two weeks.

...and that was just this morning.

"Uh, no, mom. Just lost something. But thanks for reminding me."

"Oh? Well, what is it? Maybe I can help you look or maybe I've seen it."

"Oops. Never mind, found it." I said, holding up a naked Barbie doll.

She looked at me strangely and then murmured something about cleaning up the mess and then let herself out of the room.

So believe me, I've looked.

In fact, I've looked and found evidence of her unfaithfulness everywhere.

Or should I say 'Faith'fulness...she's a fucking cheat and so full of herself.

I caught her red-handed in a lie.

We had just finished making love, a long make-out session beforehand and lots of finger foreplay to boot. It was just after the oral when she glanced at the clock and jumped up.

"Fuck, I'm late!" she exclaimed, panic on her face.

"Late for what?" I asked, heart in my throat.

"Uh...um..."

What, your other girl? I thought.

"Uh, I've got a slaying engagement. Willy put up some cash against some braggart demon that blew into town, claiming he could kick the shit out of anyone in sight. Uh...so, Willy put me down as a contender. I gotta go meet them at the docks, B, and I'm late...I've got my rep to keep, yunno."

"Really? Willy picked you and not me?" I asked, stumped.

"Yeah, B. I guess second best is better than nothing. I guess he thought you wouldn't be interested. Hope he doesn't lose his shirt putting his money on a second-rate Slayer like me." She looked annoyed.

I didn't mean it the way it sounded. I mean, not entirely.

"Let me go with you." I decided top billing was a good thing to be.

"Why, B? Concerned for my safety or you wanna steal my thunder? Either way, you insult me. Fuck, I'm nothing but a loser to you aren't I?"

I put my hand on her arm and she looked down at it.

"Of course not, Faith. I just wanna be there when you kick the shit out of him."

She looked at my hand for a moment longer and then shrugged it off.

"Nice try, B. Too bad I don't believe you. I'm going, you stay here. Or leave, I really don't give a fuck what you do."

Then she dressed herself and let herself out, slamming the door behind her. She never looked at me once.

So I got dressed and made my way to the docks. I thought I'd catch up with her but she was nowhere in sight. In fact, no one was in sight.

The docks were deserted and desolate, save a few indigents here and there.

So then I made my way over to Willy's place. It was closing time, but I saw Faith knocking back a few drinks at the bar.

Willy never really was one to mind the law.

I peered through the window and saw a handful of drunken demons; stumbling, mumbling, and bumping into things rather loudly. I saw no sign of a boastful braggart...

Boastful braggart. Kind of redundant, isn't it? Anyway, no sign of a boastful Ass-Kicker, just some yahoo demon types and Willy and Faith.

And she looked totally pissed off. But then I saw her laugh at something Willy had said, holding her glass up and toasting him before slamming it back.

Then she let out a Slayer sized belch.

"Mazel Tov!" the demons exclaimed.

"No, FUCK OFF." Faith snarled with a gleam in her eye.

The demons got very quiet and started filing out the door rather docilely.

I hid in the shadows. Yeah, she was kicking some demon ass alright. They were walking out on their own accord, as if they were sheep and Babe was leading them.

But the little pig was still at the bar. Belching and burping and laughing with Willy.

I swear, I really don't know what I see in her.

So I left her there and went home. About an hour or so later, she let herself in through my window.

Drunk and horny and wanting very much to get laid.

A drunk, horny Faith is something one should never pass up if given the opportunity.

Uh...

What's in YOUR closet and do you have an earring missing?

Sorry.

I really wasn't jealous before we met. Not like this, anyway. Not to this extreme.

So she let herself in, catching her rear boot on the window sill, tripping as she tried to step over it.

"Whoops!" she said giggling. I sat up in bed and looked at her.

"Shhh...shhhh." she whispered loudly, holding a finger to her lips.

Yeah, she knows. All we needed was for mom to find a drunken, horny Faith in her daughter's bedroom.

Did my mother have emerald earrings?

Oh fuck, somebody shoot me.

She climbed onto the bed, shushing me. I sat there quietly as she crawled up to me.

"Baby...baby...you...you wan'shom lovin?" she slurred.

"You kick that demon's ass?" I asked her.

"You...hic...know it." she grinned, flexing a muscle. She moved in closer and I could smell the booze on her breath.

"Give ush a kiss...ba-beeey." she hiccupped.

I kissed her to shut her up. The alcohol was thick on her tongue as I sucked on it. She started to peel off her clothing, kissing me the entire time. First her jacket -NOT the brown one- then her shirt and then her pants. Except her boots were still on and she found herself in a predicament.

"Wha...fuck?" she muttered, looking down at herself, confused.

It was funny, but she had just lied to me, so she wasn't getting so much as one smile.

But I did reach down to give her a hand.

"Hell yeah, fuck my pussy." she grinned sloppily. I glared at her and she shut up.

She looked at me and whispered

"No? You don't want my pussy?"

I shook my head and rolled my eyes, freeing her pants from her boots. She's wasted.

Naked, finally, with no clothing to hinder her, she pulled me back up and then flipped me over, kissing my back.

"S'okay, I'll fuck you...til shombody better comes along."

I swear she said that. I heard it. I turned over and grabbed her by the hair, yanking her up to me. She had started to lick down my body, but now I wanted to look at her face.

Tell me again...say it. Say it to my face.

"Ow, B." she whimpered, tears already in her eyes.

"What did you say?" I asked her.

"When?" she asked, sobering up, moving her head to free herself from my grip. I held on tighter.

"Just now."

"I can't remember. I'm gonna fuck you?" she asked, blinking a tear away.

The tough-as-nails Slayer couldn't take a little hair pulling?

I ran my fingers to her scalp, tugging tight, and jerked her head backward.

"Ohhh, fuck..." she groaned. I looked at the long line of beautiful skin in front of me and ran my lips and teeth over it. I licked at the hollow by her neck and then grazed her flesh with my teeth again. I bit and sucked her hard. She started to pant.

I released my grip from her hair and her head lolled to the side before dropping forward. Her hair fell onto her face, but I could tell she was crying...

I hurt her. I went too far.

I brushed the hair away, tucking it behind her ears. Her eyes were closed but I saw the wet paths trailing down her cheeks. I pulled her closer to me, kissing her face and kissing her soft lips.

"I'm sorry, baby...oh, god, I'm so sorry." I whispered, between kisses.

"Just fuck me, B." she sobbed. "I can't feel anything."

I reached in between us and felt her hand searching for mine. I let her take it and put it inside of her. Three fingers, down to the last knuckle. She started moving my hand.

"Harder, Buffy...I need it. I need you to fuck me." she pleaded.

Faith never pleaded. Not ever, not once.

Her other bitches must not know how to do it right. But I did, and she knew it. So I fucked her like she asked.

Like she begged.

"Oh...god...uh...Bu...Buffy...uh..."

I can fuck with the best of them. I can fuck like Faith. I worked my fingers in and out of her hole, twisting my wrist and feeling her pussy opening up from my thrusting.

Sometimes she gets so worked up that my entire fist can find its way inside of her.

But not that night. That night it was just three fingers and my anxious tongue.

I don't care what you say, but penetration without clitoral stimulation does not an orgasm make.

Close, as Faith would say, but no cigar.

And I planned on giving her the entire box. Cuban, and I did.

"Baby, roll over." I whispered. She moved onto her back while I kept my fingers in her snatch.

"Put your leg on my shoulder." I instructed.

She lifted her right leg and placed it on my left shoulder. I kissed it as she slid her other leg up to accommodate my fingers. I kissed her left knee and pulled my fingers out to push it wider.

"Open up for me, Faith. Feel me inside you." And I slipped them back inside.

She groaned and looked up at me, lashes glistening from her tears.

"I feel you, B...I do...I really do."

And with a sob she laid her head back onto the pillow, crossing her arms over her eyes.

Probably so she wouldn't have to see who was fucking her. So she could pretend it was somebody else, somebody she was really into.

I know that's what she was doing because I used to do it myself.

A little after we had first started, I used to pretend it was Angel who was with me.

Sometimes I even imagined that cute guy from French class or the boy who mowed our lawn last summer. Anyone, actually, other than Faith.

It was just too much at the time. All these new sensations, the way she made me feel. So I needed something to anchor me, something familiar, something less scary.

And that would mean a boy, not a girl. Something acceptable, something normal.

I used to think it bothered her at first, because she'd stop what she was doing until I'd move my arms away to look at her. She would look deeply into my eyes and then slowly shake her head. But then she would move her finger inside of me and my eyes would begin to flutter, my arms creeping over my face again. She'd give a small sigh and go back down on me.

I got over it, eventually. So it's not like I did it all the time.

Just towards the beginning...

...well, maybe a few more times after that. But she didn't bother to stop anymore, she just kept on doing what she was doing. So that's when I figured out that she really didn't mind.

I mean, Faith knew that I was straight. We're not all as sexually adventuresome as she is.

Or as confident.

So when she covered her eyes that night, I knew what she was doing. She was pretending it wasn't me...but I knew she knew that it was.

She said she could feel me, didn't she?

But I wanted her to see it was me, too.

I leaned down over her, placing my body above hers, her leg going higher as I pushed into it with my shoulder. I began to kiss her chin and her lips -any part of her face that wasn't covered- until she finally moved her arms away.

My fingers penetrated her pussy as my green eyes penetrated her brown.

"What do you feel?" I whispered, thrusting my fingers.

"You." Came her whispered reply.

"Who do you see?" I demanded.

"You." More tears welled in her eyes.

I used my left hand to keep her arms from covering her face. I pulled my fingers out of her pussy and traced her features gently with them, wiping my thumb across her eyes, and then placing a finger on her lips.

"Whose finger is this?" I asked her.

"Yours." she murmured.

"Whose pussy does it belong in?"

"Mine."

"Whose finger?"

"Yours."

"Whose pussy?"

"Mine."

And then I put it in there to show her she was right.

We had rough, drunken sex that night. I was rough, she was drunk. But she prefers it that way, and that night I had no problem giving it to her.

"I want you to stay quiet. Can you do that?" I asked her.

She nodded her head.

"You want it rough?" I asked her.

She nodded her head and then grabbed the back of mine, smashing her lips to my mouth.

I let her run her tongue inside, stopping to bite my lip and suck on my tongue. The alcohol she consumed was enflaming her senses and soon it began to enflame mine. I pushed her deeper into the pillows as I worked my way back down her body. I bit and licked her skin, leaving little bite marks along the way. I paid special attention to her breasts.

I grazed my teeth on the undersides of both of them, taking her tender flesh and nipping it with my front teeth. I licked the crease under each breast and then licked my way around to the top, latching my lips onto her nipples. I spent equal time on both of them, making sure to suck harder on her left one.

She favors the left one.

I worked my way lower. Her hips already moving to direct me, to show me the way...

...but I'm not like her other girls. I know the way.

I licked and nibbled on her stomach, making wet little suction noises as I trailed my lips and tongue to the inside of her raised thigh. She hooked her leg around my neck and pulled me to her, forcing my face to her snatch.

I was going there, anyway. It's not like she didn't know that.

It's not like in our earlier days when I was still shy about it. When I would receive a lot more than I would give.

She was actually a smart-ass about it, too.

Naming the dent in the pillow that my head made. Calling it Queen Elisabeth.

Or Queen B, for short.

She said I made her feel like a drone. A busy little worker bee trying to make her Queen B happy. But she was joking. She said she loved the honey she got from my flower...from between my pink petals...

With my face buried in her pussy, I plunged two fingers inside her, sucking roughly on her clit. She jerked in response and then found a steady rhythm with her hips...aiding me with my thrusting, moving a hand to my head to guide me.

"Bite it, B...uhhh...then...lick me."

And I did. I bit her gently on her clit then returned with a flat tongue, moving it up and down as her clit responded to the stimulation, growing harder and slicker from each stroke.

I moved my fingers faster and deeper inside her hole. I felt her open up again and a third finger slipped inside, moving with her hips and keeping the same time.

We dance well together between the sheets. Like we used to at the Bronze. Before she stopped going there with me.

But that's another story.

"Oh god...fuck..." she groaned, letting me know she was close.

I pulled back and flipped her over forcefully, a short burst of air escaping her lungs from the sudden surprise.

"Nngh?" she grunted.

I put my arm under her waist and pulled her lower half up, her face in the mattress and her butt in the air. I slipped three fingers back into her pussy as I tongued up her ass. I placed my hand at the top of her neck and then ran my nails down her back.

Hard.

"Ohhhhhhh gawd." she groaned, shuddering.

I slid my tongue inside her hot hole, it puckered against my tongue and grabbed onto it. I pushed it in and out and it tugged at my tongue, tugging at it, making me tingle. The wetness from her pussy was seeping out and was coating my entire hand. Her scent was thick in the air and it made me dizzy with desire.

She was incredibly turned on. She was turning me on.

I pulled my tongue out and whispered to her.

"What, baby? What do you want? Tell me what you want."

"You." she groaned.

I pressed her into the mattress as I crawled up her back. I licked my way up her spine and stopped by her ear. The right side of her face was pushed into the pillow, but her left side was exposed to my gaze. She looked so sexy and submissive...eyes closed with lashes glistening, bruised puffy lips that were parted and panting.

"What?" I whispered.

"You."

I took that as a sign that she didn't care what I did, just as long as I was the one doing it. She couldn't have given me a better answer. She may have had other girls, but it was me that she wanted.

At least for that night.

I slid off her body, taking my fingers from her pussy. I positioned myself next to her as she turned on her side and draped a leg over me. She rested her head on my collar bone and looked up at me with half closed eyes. She reached for my hand and started rubbing herself with it. She let go and I took over...and then she placed her hand between my thighs.

"Fuck, B...you're a mess." she whispered.

I was a mess. A wet, sticky mess.

"Because of you." I murmured.

She let out a groan and lifted her head up to kiss me. I lowered my head so we could let our tongues play together while our fingers did the same. We thrusted and rubbed and kissed each other deeply, filling up the room with our shared scents and our heavy breathing.

She slipped an arm under me and rolled me over, pushing and pulling, tugging and shoving, moving our bodies until we were all over the bed. We did all sorts of things that night. Doggie, missionary, 69, half our bodies on the bed and the other half on the floor. We did every position from "The Joy of Lesbian Sex" minus the toys.

But I like fingers better, anyway. I could feel the soft skin on her slick fingers as she touched me, rubbed me, penetrated me...bringing me over the edge.

We came clutching at each other and moaning each other's names.

"Mmmm, Buffy..." she moaned.

"Ohhhhh, Faith." I cried.

In the morning she was gone.

Just a cold wet spot where her body had been. The only proof she had been there, plus the familiar ache in my pussy from her talented fingers.

A soreness souvenier. Faith always left me with a souvenier.

I wonder how many other girls are walking around funny?

It's not funny.

I look around the room and decide to straighten up. I can't really blame Faith for all of the mess; I have things here, too.

I throw on some clothes and open the door to let in some air. I open the window.

This dark room has become a den of debauchery, a lair of lasciviousness, a portico for pussy.

And not just mine, either. Although I'm not sure when she would find the opportunity to bring them back here. Plus all of my things are lying about and unless the girl was blind, she could tell these things weren't Faith's.

Like the little lamb and big bad wolf stuffed animals. Well, maybe that could be mistaken for Faith's, because she always liked to position the wolf behind the lamb in a rather disgusting manner. With the wolf's mouth clamped over the little lamb's neck, no less.

Okay, besides that, all my other things looked like they wouldn't belong to her.

Bunny slippers. Sheep pajamas. Various body products and 'girly-girl' cosmetics.

Please, anything pink is girly to her. But she likes it on me and she told me so.

"Mmm, baby. I love your pink lips."

Huh.

Come to think of it, she was going down on me at the time....

Anyway, she likes that I'm so girly even though she teases me about it.

"Look, B...M & M's has pastel colors for Easter...we should stock up for you."

Or

"Hey, B, a new magazine for girls. 'All Pink, All the Time'. I just bought you a subscription."

Imagine my surprise when the first one arrived at my house concealed in a plain brown wrapper with my name on it. Imagine my mom's surprise when she opened it.

'All Pink, All the Time', my ass. Well, okay, my ass as well, but so were all of the other girls asses and pussies in the magazine. It wasn't a magazine for girls, it was a girly magazine.

I had a hard time explaining that one to my mom.

Plus the sheets were scented with my perfume. Not just because it came off while I was wearing it, but because I made sure to spray it on them before I left each day.

It's not like Faith wears Brute or Hi-Karate, but she's not exactly a Charlie Girl, either.

And yes, I wear Charlie. It's retro and I like it.

Let's see...what else?

My underwear. Okay, Faith's underwear is nicer than mine, but still.

My...toothbrush!

Okay, maybe not that either. Mine is blue and rather normal looking while hers has a Spiderman head at the top.

She even has the whole Justice League of America collection, minus Wonder Woman.

I can't seem to find it for her. Seems she's a very popular item to stick in your mouth. I've checked eBay and they only have used ones, and I'm not even going to tell Faith about that. I can just hear it now.

"What? Used? So what, B? Nothing a little bleach or rubbing alcohol can't fix."

Or turpentine or battery acid.

No, I don't think so.

But the room does look like a couple lives here. And to be honest, Faith encouraged me to bring things.

"What's the point, B? You going home and lugging all your things over every night. Just pack some shit and keep it here. Bring that pig of yours, too."

Although she probably meant my clothing and not necessarily my belongings.

But now we have a poster of Mahatma Gandhi fasting for peace next to a poster of Ozzie Osbourne biting the head off a bat.

"B, not to criticize your heroes or nuthin, but don't you think that Gandhi guy coulda used more to eat? I mean, look at his eyes...I swear I see them moving to Ozzie, wanting a bite of that sucker...lookin all jealous and stuff."

I straighten up the room, dusting and vacuuming and putting things away.

No, they didn't come back here. They went back to HER place, whoever she is.

Miss I-Only-Have-One-Emerald-Earring-In-My-Ear.

Miss I-Have-Faith's-Brown-Leather-Jacket-In-My-Closet.

Miss I'm-The-Reason-Faith-Leaves-You-In-The-Middle-Of-The-Day-And-Part-Of-The-Night.

Bitch. I fucking hate her.

I pick up the handset to the phone and clean it with Windex. I run the paper towel over the answering machine next to it.

Mom made me buy one for Faith. Well, she bought it, insisting I take it to her.

"Buffy, since you seem to be there all the time, I want to be able to reach you. I know your Slayer duties are important, but so is your family. I'm your family, remember?"

I really need to spend more time with her. Coming over to do our laundry isn't really visiting is it? When mom asked why I did Faith's laundry, I told her it was easier that way. This way Faith and I could focus on training and not be waiting for available machines all day at the laundro-mat. She wasn't thrilled with that explanation to begin with, imagining Faith and me training so we won't get killed at night.

I'll come visit without laundry next time.

It's not like Faith and I lived together, but with the hours we kept and mom working during the day, she rarely saw me even when I was sleeping in my own bed.

Which was more and more lately.

I look at the answering machine and remember one of the reasons why.

Cordelia.

I rewind the machine and hit Play to see if the message was still there.

Of course it's not. She erased it, but I was here when Cordy had left it.

"Speak your piece." Beeeeep.

"God Faith, what charm school did you go to? Did you graduate? Listen, about that thing I told you about...are we still on? I got my new dancing shoes and I'm dying to have you step on my toes...when you're not too busy staring at my ass, that is. Let me know." Beeeeep.

When Faith and I used to go to the Bronze together she would always step on my toes.

It's not like she was uncoordinated or anything, she was just so used to dancing as wildly as she does. Dancing with Faith was like being sucked into the eye of a hurricane.

She was wild and tempestuous and totally into the music.

It didn't help that I wore open-toed heels and she wore steel-toed boots.

I must have complained one too many times because she refuses to go with me now.

"Wear different shoes, B." she suggested.

"I could ask the same of you." I replied.

"I tell ya what. How about I just don't come here with you anymore."

And she hasn't since.

But she's going with Cordelia now, isn't she?

Unless 'dancing shoes' and 'step on my toes' was a euphemism for sex.

Which is entirely possible for the both of them.

They're just so fucking adorable, aren't they?

Willow and Xander told me they haven't seen them there. I refused to go when they invited me because even though I suspected, I didn't want the proof thrown in my face. And not in front of my friends, especially. But I sent them out to spy after the first time they didn't see them there.

"Buffy, this is weird. Why don't you just be up-front about it and ask her?" Willow had said, confused.

"Uh, cuz she might lie?" Xander answered for me.

"Well, okay, but I still feel weird about it." Willow said.

"Hell, I don't. I'd love to bust their horny little asses. Especially Cordy's." Xander said with an evil glint in his eye.

But they found nothing. No sign, no proof, no anything of their involvement.

"Buffy, explain this to me. One minute you are telling us what a cheat she is and how she doesn't love you and then the next minute you're telling us how much she does. I don't get it." Willow asked, looking from me to Xander.

"It's the principle, Will. One minute your girl is telling you you're the next best thing to Gucci shoes and then the next minute she's telling you to get lost. People shouldn't toy with your emotions, Will, or fuck with your head." Xander stated, vehemently.

Xander had his own issues. But his were similar to mine so I considered him an ally.

"That's you and Cordy, Xander, not Faith and Buffy. But you're not so innocent yourself, remember?"

He didn't respond. Willow looked at the both of us and then turned to me.

"She's your blind spot, Buffy. You're constantly looking over your shoulder and not seeing what's there. And then to make matters worse, you see things that aren't. If you're not careful, Buffy, your blind spot will blind-side you one day."

But the good friend that she is, she went with Xander anyway, spying for me and giving me her findings.

"Nothing." Was the answer, everytime.

Which was good, I guess.

I move across the room to start dusting the dresser and the phone rings. I look at the clock and it's just past 7pm. Faith sometimes calls to see if I'm here, but I don't answer it this time.

Something is telling me not to.

After the fourth ring the machine picks up.

"Speak your piece." Beeeeep.

"Hey, charm school drop-out. Queen C, here. Listen, I went ahead and paid the rest of it off. My jeweler called and said they couldn't hold onto it any longer. And listen, don't even try to argue with me; I have an account there and you don't. I appreciate you trying to do this yourself, but I don't think you should be doing this anyway...and even though I personally like things in pairs, like a nice pair of breasts or smooth sexy thighs, in this case I would have made an exception. But besides all that, it's taking too long. So I paid it. Call me." Beeeep.

Well, there's all the proof that I need. I pick up the phone and call Willow.

"Hello?" she answers, on the second ring.

"It's her." I tell her.

"It's who?" she asks, confused.

"Queen Cunt."

"Oh...what makes you so sure this time?"

I ignore her meaning. So I've been wrong a few times...but I'm not now.

"She just left a message and said so."

"She left a message and said so? You mean she said 'Hello there, Buffy. Faith and I are having an affair and all of your paranoias were correct...oh, and this is Queen Cunt, by the way.' "

"Pretty much." When did Willow get to be so sarcastic? I thought she was with me on this.

"Really, Buffy? She said that? Or are you just reading into things again."

"When did you get to be such a big Faith fan?"

"I'm not. But you're assuming the worst. Sure, it doesn't look good, but you're not even giving her a chance to explain."

"I asked about the jacket." I remind her.

She sighs. "Okay Buffy, you win. If you really think they're up to something, you should just suck it up and end it."

"What?? I can't do that!" What, is she crazy?

"And why's that?"

"Well, because I...uh...I..."

"...don't have any proof. Go ahead, say it."

"You're starting to piss me off, Willow."

"Yeah, I know."

"As long as you know." I hang up.

As long as you know....What Faith had said right before she kissed me the first time. In the bubblebath. In Cordy's expensive French bubblebath. I should have gone with my gut at the time and not have let this gone any further.

But that first time was just so incredible. It was before my paranoias about being with a woman really sank in.

She had laid me on the bed and looked at me so intently, so seriously, nothing at all like I expected her to be. She held me and touched me like I was the most precious thing she'd ever seen. Like I was glass and that any minute her hold on me would shatter me and leave me in pieces.

She did leave me in pieces. But not that night. That night she started so tenderly that she made me feel completely safe and secure...safe enough to let her know that I wouldn't break if she showed me her passion...if she unleashed her lust.

I remember encouraging her.

"Faith...Faith, show me..." I breathed.

She was kissing my neck, rubbing my nipple and sliding her finger gently over my clit. It was divine, but deliriously maddening. This was Faith and I wanted her to be herself with me.

If I had wanted someone to hold back, I would have stayed with Angel.

I wanted all of it. All of it...soft, tender, hot and hard.

I wanted Faith.

She looked at me intently and said

"I don't want to scare you, B." And she waited for my reply.

"You won't." And I reached down and slid her hand to my hole, slipping a finger inside.

The feeling of her finger inside of me was indescribable. She must have had similar feelings because she suddenly groaned and then slipped another one inside. I gasped from the intimacy of it, her fingers in my most private of places...her strong powerful hand moving against my whole pussy as she worked her digits in and out of me.

"Oh my god, Faith...oh...god."

She moved her head toward my breast and captured a nipple with her mouth. She began to tease it with nibbles and tiny soft nips before wrapping her tongue around it and sucking hard, moving her tongue up and down as she applied more pressure.

She reached over to my other breast and cupped the whole thing and started kneading it roughly, her fingers still working my pussy.

She was just so good...but I knew she still wasn't giving me her all.

I thrusted myself up against her.

"More..." I murmured.

"More?" she mumbled, looking up at me.

"More." I murmured, again.

A "thank you, Jesus!" escaped from her lips and then she flipped me onto my stomach.

Oh, boy. Lemme tell you.

The thoughts that raced through my mind at that moment went from confusion to fear to frenzy. Suddenly her fingers were everywhere, SHE was everywhere, and I found myself beginning to tense up.

She must have felt it. Because she leaned down and whispered in my ear.

"Shhh, relax, B. Let me show you...you're safe with me." she soothed.

And it worked. Her soft, sultry tone that had sent shivers down my spine earlier, was now making me melt.

I let her show me.

She slowy rubbed my neck, massaging my butt with her other hand. She'd move both hands to knead my shoulders, and then she'd move one hand to my neck again and the other one to my butt.

She'd rub me this way; neck, butt, shoulders, neck, butt, shoulders and occasionally she would take both hands and run them over my entire back -languid, fluid, warm and encompassing- and then she would begin again; neck, butt, shoulders...

I became so relaxed, so jelly-like, that I didn't even notice when she slipped a finger into my ass.

It was smooth and surprisingly graceful.

She had been kneeling over me, her right knee between my legs, and she slowly let her leg slide sideways to gently nudge my thighs wider. She had rubbed my butt with both hands at one point, but then when one went up to my shoulders to knead it, the other one didn't.

It had traveled down south, instead.

Not into my ass right away, that would have been too obvious. Plus it would have defeated what she had been doing.

What she did was move one hand to massage my shoulder and moved her other to my pussy. Softly, slyly, taking her four fingers and rubbing my slit, rubbing my clit, gathering the moisture and spreading it around. So slyly, in fact, that I found myself tingling without knowing why.

Mmmm, she gives a good massage, I thought. She's got great hands.

Her other hand would continue to knead me, keeping up the ruse, moving from my neck to my butt to my shoulder. The other one rubbed my clit and my opening and collected my excitement and she'd begin to run it between my cheeks.

I really didn't know. All I knew was that everything felt so damn good and that she was a wiz with her hands.

I thought I felt her everywhere, even if she wasn't actually touching me everywhere.

But she was.

She continued with the ruse, kneading my neck and my butt, murmuring incoherent words that had no real meaning but somehow made sense at the time...

...not sweet nothings...sexy nothings.

Very, very sexy nothings.

She would press her breasts into my back and whisper things in my ear, making me shiver from the heat and moisture from her breath.

"Buffy...Buffy, you feel so good. You're so warm and wet...mmm...your skin."

And

"Oh god, Buffy...do you like it? Do you like me touching you? I think you do...I think you do...god, I love the way you feel."

But mostly she would breathe into my ear, murmuring words without any structure.

"Sexy...soft", "Mmm...so hard", "Closer", "Beautiful", "Baby".

Faith whispering 'baby' in my ear was sexy enough, but when she said

"Baby...open up...let me inside you...I wanna make you feel good...let me make you feel good, baby..."

...well, by then she had one finger inside.

She had been rubbing circles over it and playing with the pucker, tapping her finger against it with my moisture.

I could hear it, but still I didn't know.

It just sounded wet and I felt her finger against it...and then it was inside.

It made me raise off of the mattress a bit, but she laid her body on top of mine to still me.

"Relax, B..." she whispered. "...let me do this." And she kissed me and worked her way down my body, moving to the finger she had buried deep in my ass and then she licked around it.

"Mmmm...ohhhh..." I sighed. Soft and tender...hot and hard...I felt it.

Her finger in my ass was amazing. She'd move it slowly at first and then faster, then she pulled it out to use her tongue. She placed her finger back inside and then moved her other hand to finger my clit.

I raised myself off the mattress again, and she murmured in a husky voice

"That's right, Buffy...feel my finger...ride on it."

On their own, my hips started a circular motion, my ass in the air with her finger in it.

"Yeah, B...that's it, ride it, baby..." she encouraged, moving her finger.

And I did. Rotating my hips, her finger tight in my ass, and her other one stroking my clit.

It was almost too much.

But it wasn't.

She leaned back up to kiss me, tonguing me hard, the right side of my face smashed into the pillows. She sucked on my lips and then whispered

"Now I'm gonna eat you."

Oh, god. Lemme tell you.

She kissed her way down my back, stopping every so often to bite the skin on my hips and my butt. She took her finger out and spread my cheeks and began rimming my ass with her tongue. Then she stuck the tip inside and just left it there...still fingering my clit and making me squirm.

Geezus, I wanted it so bad. I pushed backwards and felt her tongue slide inside; warm, wet, and silky. She opened her mouth and I could feel her teeth against me as she thrusted her tongue deeper into my hole.

In and out and in and out...

I thought I would scream from the sensations.

I began to rock myself against her, my ass in her face, her finger on my clit...

...rubbing, licking, rubbing, licking...

"Oh my god, Faith...what are you doing to me??" I cried.

She stopped her finger and moved her head down, burying her nose in my pussy. She started lapping at my clit.

Okay.

Her hot tongue in my ass and her finger on my clit was one thing...but her tonguing my clit was another. It was pulsating...throbbing...twitching...

Her tongue was firm and pointy in my ass, but on my clit it became large and soft, wide and flat...just amazingly supple...and it was just...it was just...

Oh god, it just was.

I lifted my ass higher so she could angle her neck better. I slipped a hand between my legs spreading my lips for her...and then I felt her hot wet tongue slide against my fingers.

She moved her tongue over them and then lapped back at my clit. I put my two fingers closer together, on either side of it, so I could feel her hot tongue as she licked me. Like two tiny legs with a gigantic clit in the middle...

Because I was hard. Really hard. And her soft tongue against it made me insane.

"I'm losing my mind!" I muffled into the pillows, rubbing my pussy into her face.

"Yeah, B...go crazy." she muffled back, stopping to encourage me and then continuing again.

Her tongue on my clit, her tongue on my fingers...I couldn't take it.

"Faith, wait...wait..." I breathed, flipping over.

She looked up at me from between my thighs and grinned at me.

"Missionary is cool, B. I'm all for tradition." Then she shoved her face in my snatch and thrusted two fingers inside along with it.

"mmmngfff!" I exclaimed, raising my hips.

Boy, lemme tell you.

She did things that have never been done to me before.

Even without much to compare it to, I knew this was something special...not your average run-of-the-mill experience...although it was probably just average to her.

Because I still think she was holding something back...but right then it was more than enough for me.

I began to thrust myself softly in her face, trying to catch a rhythm...she watched my movements and then mimicked me, slowing down her fingers and tongue, then reached up to play with a breast.

She pulled gently on the nipple, pinching it between two fingers and then rubbed the tip of it slowly.

I was wired. Every nerve on my body was connected and she was the current.

Suddenly, without warning, she shoved her fingers deeply into me, hitting my hot spot and sending me spiraling over the brink.

I must have blacked out for a second, but when I came to, she was pounding me so hard and licking me so fast that I forgot I came already and did it again.

"Ohhhh...ohhhhhh...ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh." And she kept at it, slowing it down and then speeding back up. She was completely relentless and I was just breathless...

Because I moaned until there was nothing left to give.

Weakly, but with determination, I willed my thighs to clamp around her head.

She needed to stop....dear God, please make her stop, I thought.

And eventually, she did.

She looked up at me with a soft smile curling her lips before it slowly started to fade.

A slight worried look was then replaced in her eyes.

Because I was freaked and it must have shown on my face.

See, she was trouble, and I knew it.

She was wild and untamed...and there she was, between my thighs, making me feel wild and untamed.

It was a bit more than what I had bargained for.

"What's the matter, Buffy? Didn't you like it?" she asked, softly.

"I liked it." I murmured. A little too much, I added to myself. "Um..."

"What?" she asked, confused.

"Nothing." I answered, vaguely.

"Oh." She looked at me intently for a moment and then her guard came up.

I knew that look. It was a familiar sight to my eyes.

But I was okay with it, because right then I needed something to guard me from her.

"Well, don't worry, B. It's not like it means anything. Just a little post-slayage action to calm our nerves. Consider it a community service from one Slayer to another."

She got up and went into the bathroom and brought out my clothes. She looked at me briefly then went back inside and shut the door behind her.

It wasn't supposed to be like this, I thought.

She was supposed to fuck me and then kick me out the door.

Okay, not literally, but it wasn't supposed to feel like this. The intensity, the tenderness, the whispered sexy nothings and complete attentiveness she gave me.

She was just supposed to get off and then call it a night.

But she never even touched herself or asked me to do it.

She never really even implied it.

"...you're not gonna crank me up just to wind me down." Was only said when I stopped kissing her.

I got dressed and left, I never even said goodbye. It was just too much to think about.

The next day was strange, because she acted like everything was normal.

She laughed with me, joked with me, and even threw out her standard sexual innuendos.

Okay, I thought. This was do-able.

So that night I decided to come over, too.

We had parted company in the cemetary and not ten minutes later I was knocking on her door.

When she opened it, I said

"Community service, ma'm." And I saluted her. She grinned at me as I let myself in.

That night she showed me other things.

Things that she liked and that I learned to like doing to her...did I say like?

I loved doing the things she taught me. She was a very patient teacher with her green-but-willing-to-learn student.

And very encouraging, if I may add.

"Yeah, B...that's it, baby...lick it." She'd tell me.

Or

"Mmmm, that's right, B...slip it inside, work that finger..."

Or

"Jesus Christ, baby, not that hole...the other one."

It became a nightly occurance, us giving 'community service' to each other.

No one really noticed when we hurried through patrol. Or if they did, no one mentioned it.

It wasn't until our afternoon trysts at the 'Y' had started when someone first suspected something.

And, of course, it was Cordelia.

"Rushing off for 'lunch' again, are you?" she said with an arched eyebrow.

"Got me a wicked appetite, C." Faith had replied, grinning.

"Hmm, yes, I know...and you seem to be 'eating' a lot more these days, Buffy. You're always rushing off to have 'lunch' with her, too."

What did she mean 'Hmm, yes, I know'?? But I kept it to myself and just smiled at the bitch as I thought

Yeah, and to your French goddamn bubblebath, so there!

"Funny thing..." Cordy continued. "...you still seem as scrawny as ever."

"Gotta love that Slayer metabolism, Cor. Jealous, much?" Xander interrupted, before I could respond.

"Yeah, my fat ass is in sorry need of a diet." Cordy answered sarcastically, running her hands over her hips suggestively.

Xander's mouth gaped open...

...and so did Faith's.

My mouth opened too, but not for the same reason.

"That's right, Cordy. Faith and I have our own Slayer 'diet' and we'd like to get to it, so move your fat ass out of our way."

Cordy raised her eyebrow again and Faith shrugged apologetically as I dragged her in-SO-much-trouble ass from the room.

Cunt. Queen Cunt.

And Faith just gawking at her.

Please.

Okay, so Cordelia was hot, but she seriously needed an attitude adjustment...

...and her face rearranged.

She's lucky I didn't do it for her right there on the spot.

Faith just laughed at me once we were back at her motel.

"Geezus, B. You're still green, but it's not from lack of experience, that's for sure."

Okay, we've already established that I'm a jealous person. That fucking Cordy...

She really brought home that fact.

Faith was on her knees pouring bubblebath into the water, chuckling, when I snatched the bottle from her hand.

"Fuck you and fuck this!" I exclaimed, as I smashed the bottle to the ground.

She looked at me in surprise as I glared at her.

"Whooa, Buffy, calm down now, I didn't mean anything by it."

"I think you did, I think you like sexing me up in Cordy's French bubblebath." I said, trying to contain my anger.

"What? Cordy's French bubblebath?" she asked, acting like she was confused.

Fine. She was playing stupid and I really had no time for it.

"Fine, Faith...Cordy's or some other girl's, then."

"B..."

"No, Faith, I don't want to hear it. We came here for a reason so let's just get on with it."

The only thing that I wanted to come out of her mouth right then was her tongue.

She stood up and her face became guarded again. She said

"At your service." Then she stepped onto the broken glass and lifted me into her arms.

I remember everything about that afternoon, everything...

...because that's when everything started to change.

From the sound her boots made as the glass crunched under them, to the sound the box springs made as we landed on top...to the rough, horny sex that ensued.

I remember it all.

It was when I slapped her that it started...really started.

She was looking down at me, all sexy and hungry, coming in for a kiss. My mind may have been on Cordy, but my hand found itself slapping her face.

She looked at me stunned...and I could tell for a moment that she wanted to hit me back.

But she didn't.

So then I back-handed her.

I can still hear the second slap echoing in my mind.

She looked at me calmly, her face a sudden mask of steely reserve.

"Go ahead, B. Get it out." And she stared me down, daring me to do so.

"Do it, B. Hit me." she whispered quietly. I made no move, I just looked at her with my hands clenching at my sides.

"Do it." she mocked.

I was so angry.

"Do it."

I felt my right hand ball up into a fist, my nails digging into my palm.

"DO IT!!" she shouted, and my right arm shot out from my side and caught her under her chin.

Her head snapped backward as she flew off the bed; she hit the wall hard and slid down to land with a thud.

I was over her in a heartbeat, pulling her up by her shirt, ramming my tongue down her throat. She regained her balance and linked her arms under my ass, wrapping my legs around her. She turned us around and slammed me hard into the wall. I wove my fingers in her hair and grabbed her head to mine, smashing our mouths together as she used her lower body to pin me. She reached in between us and used both hands to rip my blouse away.

These things still echo in my mind, as well...

The sound of cloth tearing and the snap of elastic as she yanked off my bra. The straps on my shoulders had given way and it stung when she did it...yes...I can remember it now...now, but not then.

Because then I forgot all about it when she buried her face in my breasts, teasing the nipples with her tongue, holding one between her front teeth and then sucking at it like she was a Hoover.

I started to move my crotch against her stomach, trying to create friction, trying to scratch that itch that kept growing. She growled against my breast and pulled back abruptly, allowing my feet to hit the ground. My fingers grabbed her collar and I dropped to my knees, ripping her shirt and pulling her down with me.

Pants, belt, socks, shoes...soon we were naked and everything became a blur.

A blur of arms, legs, fingers and teeth.

It was a frenzy of fucking and I never felt so alive.

We fucked each other with purpose, with deliberation, but neither of us knew what it was.

Again...it just was.

It was, it was and it was.

She began cursing when I bit on her clit and then came while I was fucking her ass.

She growled at me and pulled me up by my throat, shoving two fingers inside me. I tried to bury my face in her neck, but she wouldn't allow it.

She just held my throat in her hand while she fucked me, looking me deep in the eyes. I closed them at times, but they'd open again, because her fingers made sure that they did.

She had me in a stranglehold.

Her thumb on my windpipe, her fingers in my pussy and her eyes drilling holes into mine.

And it felt...

Suddenly the heel of her hand began bumping my clit and she started using her groin for more force. She'd move her hips slower, but her fingers dived deeper, her heel would hit harder...and each movement brought me closer...so much closer...

...yes, that much closer to losing my mind.

"Buffy..." she panted; fingers probing, eyes probing, her look was watchful and intent. She moved her fingers from my throat to caress my cheek, and then palmed it as she leaned up to kiss me.

"Buffy..." she whispered...and I felt it. It felt like her fingers were larger in size, wider in girth and deeper inside me.

I felt it...

...and it was her.

The look on her face must have mirrored my eyes, because her expression changed from wonder to wonderment.

Pulling me down, she kissed my lips...kissing my eyelids, kissing my face...as my body continued to respond to her.

I felt my walls clench tightly around her fingers and then seven sensations shot through me...she held me securely as I sobbed into her neck.

Seven sensations...seven.

Safety
Relief
Comfort
Caring
Connection
Control
and Fear

The terror of losing the first five sensations actually gave the final two existence.

Control, because now she had it. And fear...

...because now she could hurt me.

And just like that, our 'community service' changed dramatically that day.

Because suddenly it became a necessity for me and not just a diversion...

...and I didn't want her to know it.

BRRRRIIINNNGG

I am jolted into the present when the phone rings. Heart racing, I grab the handset before I can even think about it.

Slayer reflexes really suck sometimes.

"Hello?" I answer, breathless, trying to calm my nerves.

"Hey baby, I'm glad you're still there. I got sumpthin for ya." she says, happily.

I'm quiet.

"Baby?"

What, another Catholic school girl's uniform?

"B?"

"What, Faith, another outfit?" I say, trying to keep the sarcasm down.

"Not this time, baby, but I think you're gonna like it!" she says excitedly, not catching my tone.

"That's nice, Faith. When are you coming home?" My voice is normal now. It's not sarcastic at all...because I'm an adult.

An adult, an adult, an adult.

"I thought I'd grab us something to eat first, B, whatcha want?"

"Nothing." Like I can eat anything right now.

"What, baby? I can't hear you." Stupid fucking pay phones...

She needs to get a cell!

"Just you, Faith, hurry home." I say louder.

She laughs. "Sounds good, baby. We can order us a pizza or six, cuz I got me a wicked appetite, B."

Okay, letting that go because I'm an adult...

"Baby?"

" 'Hmm, yes, I know.' " Quoting Cordelia. Dammit, I couldn't help it!

"You better. You're one of the reasons I'm so hungry all the time."

One of the reasons.

And Cordy's the other one. That fucking cunt.

Willow is right. I need to suck it up.

I need to end this thing before I lose my resolve.

"Hurry home, Faith."

"Damn, B. I miss you too. I'll make like The Flash and be there in a blink, okay?"

"Sure, Faith. Just hurry." I hang up the phone.

I'm not really tricking her. I do want to see her.

But I need to break up with her, too.

Her happy demeanor will make it difficult, though. She's just so adorable when she gets this way. Happy, excited, attentive, delighted...

She better hurry or I really will lose my resolve.

I start to gather my things.

I have almost everything packed when I hear her boots on the stairs, taking them three at a time...she's excited to see me.

This is going to be hard.

"Baby!" she shouts, with a smile on her face. She freezes when she enters the doorway.

I watch as she scans the room quickly and then rests on the bed.

"It's been three weeks already, B?" she asks quietly, looking at my bags.

I do not do this every three weeks! She's the one who gets weird after two!

Besides, this time it's different. This time I mean it.

This time there's proof.

I shoot her a victorious look and walk to the answering machine, never breaking my eyes with hers. She watches me place my finger on the button and then I pause before pressing Play dramatically.

We resume eye contact as Cordy's voice comes from the machine. "Hey, charm school drop-out. Queen C, here. Listen..."

I watch her face and it's motionless. Not one tic, not one smirk, not one raised eyebrow...

Not even a blink as she continues to stare at me. "...it's taking too long. So I paid it. Call me." Beeeeep.

She just stands there, looking at me. She's not even trying to deny it.

"Well?" I say, raising my eyebrow.

"Well, what?" she says, not raising hers.

"You're not even gonna deny it?"

"Deny what, B? That you're leaving?"

"Want me to play it again?"

"If it makes you feel better."

"No, Faith. What would make me feel better is if you told me."

"Told you what, Buffy? That I'm glad that you're leaving? Would it make it easier?"

I'm over it. Play stupid, I don't care.

I grab my bags and glance at the 'present' she got me.

She's got a hanger on the crook of her finger and it's slung over one shoulder.

Her brown leather jacket in a dry-cleaning bag.

Riiiight. Like I'm supposed to believe it was there this whole time.

"Don't even bother." I laugh, walking past her.

"I wouldn't even try." Comes her quiet reply.

I'm out the front door and she calls out to me.

"Hey, Buffy."

I stop and turn around. I look at her.

"Don't bother coming back this time."

And I smirk.

"Oh, don't worry...I wouldn't even try."

And I leave her there with her fucking nerve and her fucking brown leather jacket.

It's been four weeks and I'm fine.

Four weeks without worries or doubts or her crass behavior.

Four weeks of going to the bathroom when I want to, eating when I want to, and sleeping when I want to.

So what if I had to borrow a few pills.

Mom has plenty. She'll never miss them.

She still has a little trouble when I patrol at night. You don't get a lot of sleep when you have a Slayer for a daughter.

Or a lover.

But that's not my problem anymore, it's Cordy's.

And I see them patrolling at night, too.

Casually leaving the cemetary when I approach with the gang. Well, with Xander and Willow.

I knew Faith could sense me, because I could sense her, but still she would linger until we showed up.

Rubbing it in my face.

We would pass each other quietly.

"Cordy..." Xander would say.

"Xander." Queen Cunt would respond.

There really was no point in going there, anyway. Any vamps or demons would have been dusted or destroyed by Faith.

I said Faith, and not Cordy.

She was there merely for moral support.

"Faith, can we do this quicker next time? I'd really like to get into bed sooner."

"You got it, C."

I guess the oral support came later.

"What a bitch." Xander had whispered, as he watched them departing.

"Yep, and she snores." I added, irate.

"Cordy snores?" Xander questioned. Willow just shook her head.

"Faith, Xander, Faith." God, get with the program.

But, you know...other than that I was fine.

Like I said, no worries or doubts or crass behavior.

Four weeks of going to the bathroom when I want to, eating when I want to, sleeping when I want to.

Four weeks without Faith, and I'm fine.

Really.

The only thing she has that I need right now is my poster.

I left it there and that's why I'm going back.

No, really.

So I knock on her door but she doesn't answer. I have a key, but I don't feel right about using it. I mean, I don't live here anymore.

Not that I ever did, but you know.

But she does have my poster in there, so technically, I have a good reason. I'll just put the key on the dresser when I leave.

I knock one more time before entering.

"Faith?" I whisper, and then I go in.

Nope...not home...gone, god knows where, but not here.

I take down the poster and roll it up, putting a rubber band around it.

I look around the room to see if I missed anything else and my eyes are drawn to the ashtray.

Well, not so much the ashtray, but what's next to it.

To the small round metal box that has my barrettes in it.

And that other woman's earring. Cordy.

I open the lid and the earring's still there. I'd a thought Cordy would have taken it by now, since she now had its mate.

And mine.

Whatever. Neither are mine, but the barrettes still are. I take them out of the box and I close it.

I see the light blinking on the answering machine.

Must be a message from Cordy, because no one else calls here but her. Well, I used to, but not anymore...but maybe my mom did.

I mean, mom could be looking for me...I never told her I stopped coming here.

I mean, it could be really important. Like a...dentist appointment I've been meaning to make or the dangers of washing your whites with your coloreds.

It's possible, you know. I'm serious about hygiene and...uh...

...well, I'm especially serious about laundry.

I hit Play with a clear conscience.

"Hey tiger, Cordy here. Sorry about tonight. That cute boy I told you about finally asked me out again, and well, you know...Anyway, baby, I hope it was dead in the graveyards...oh, dear LORD that was lame! I can't believe Xander is still channeling through me. Can you get me a number for an exorcist? And please, Faith, make it quick. Anyway, hang in there and don't work too hard, okay? Oh, and make that tightwad Willy give you a raise like he promised. You're a Slayer for christ sake, not a bouncer. He's lucky to have you. Sleep tight, sweetie, and call me tomorrow. Kisses." Beeeeep.

What?

BRRRRIIINNNGG

I practically jump out of my skin. That fucking phone. I swear it hates me.

The machine picks up after the second ring.

"Speak your piece." Beeeeep.

"Oh, and one more thing. Keep the interest you owe me. That's just ridiculous. Why don't you just alter the jacket back instead? It looks better on you than it would on her anyway. Just my opinion, of course, but I do know a thing or two about fashion. I am the Queen, remember?" Beeeep.

What??

I leap for the closet. It's there, and it's still in the dry-cleaning bag.

'The Sunnydale Taylors...your home for all of your dry-cleaning and altering needs. Facilities and expert tailors on premises. Thank you for your patronage. The Taylors, a family owned business since 1898.'

1898? They had dry-cleaners back then?

They must be related to the mayor. Well, was, cus he's dead now, the snake. But it figures she'd go there; I mean, he was like an uncle to her...

...like some crazy uncle that no one ever really talks about and keeps hidden in an attic.

If only we had been so lucky.

I take it out. It's been dry-cleaned and restored and it feels like butter; it looks worn in, but not weather beaten anymore.

Plus she had the arms shortened.

It fits me perfect. A little on the baggy side, but the sleeves don't hang over my fingers anymore...and the lining is redone in pastel pink...it actually looks pretty good with the brown. Not too butch, not too femme.

Like me.

That's what she used to tell me.

"...nah, only kiddin, baby. You're not too butch and you're not too femme; you're perfect, B."

She'd tell me that after she'd tease me for being such a girly-girl...and then she'd kiss me.

I feel the lining and the satin feels smooth and cool against my fingers. I feel something rough by the inside breast pocket and I pull open the jacket to look at it...

...a snag in the new lining, maybe? No, it's not.

It's Faith embroidered in gorgeous blue script, and it's on the left breast pocket...

...and right against my heart.

Then I feel a lump.

In the pocket, not my heart...

Although, quite honestly, I do kinda feel something...but I'm just not willing to go there yet.

I fish inside the pocket and find a small plastic bubble-box like the kind from a gum-ball machine.

Two identical emerald earrings like the one in our stash box...

I mean, her stash box.

And then I remember. I remember, and now I have to go there even if I am unwilling.

Because now I remember where I saw the earring before.

In the same gift box that my birthday towels were in.

It was concealed between the towels and I thought it was a joke.

Fake emerald earrings from a gum-ball machine. I had no idea they were real.

I remember putting one on and then being distracted by another gift I was given earlier.

It was a Friendship ring that Willow had gotten me and it looked like the one Angel and I once had.

Well, it really didn't, but it was a ring and my mind had gone there anyway.

When I went home the next morning I took the earring out and then threw it away.

I had no idea it was real. I really thought it was a joke.

Oh my god.

When Faith asked me the next day where the other earring was, I lied and told her I lost it.

And I said it so casually, too. No wonder she looked a little hurt before catching herself and then grinning it away.

"No sweat, B. I'll just stick another quarter in the machine and see what else it gives us."

A quarter. $2500, maybe.

Because Cordy said it was from HER jeweler and that she stuck it on her account.

My mind begins to add these facts together and then quickly rejects them.

The jacket, the messages, the earrings...

No, I'm not wrong...

I'm not wrong.

But I need to make sure.

I pick up the phone and hit *69.

It rings and Cordelia picks up.

"Hello?"

"Cordy, I'm gonna ask you something and I want you to be straight with me."

"Oh please, Buffy, as if I would be anything but with you. The only woman I've ever considered sleeping with is hot, brunette, and has a body to die for...and I'm not talking about myself here, either."

"Well, that's a surprise, since it seems to be your favorite subject."

"Get to the point, Buffy. I don't have the patience of Faith. And why are you calling me in the first place? I told you to lose my number."

"I did lose your number, I star 69'd you."

"Sorry Buffy, I'm not interested in phone sex with you either. You can keep the star and the 69 to yourself."

"My god, you're dense. I Call Returned you, you half-wit, I'm at Faith's."

"Better a half-wit than a nit-wit, and what do you mean you're at Faith's?"

"I mean I'm at Faith's. Now shut up and answer me."

She's quiet. Good.

"What's the story with the jacket and the earrings?"

She's still quiet.

"Cordy?"

"Make up your mind, Buffy. Do you want me to shut up or answer you?"

"Answer me, smart-ass."

"What story would you like to hear?"

"How many are there?"

"Hmm, let me see...well, there's always the truth and then there's your version."

"Which is...?" I prompt impatiently.

"Which, Buffy? The truth or your version? Be more specific, please, I can't hear the voices in your head."

"Cordy, just get to the point, I don't have 'the patience of Faith' either."

"No, you don't, do you? It's a pity, really, because she really is worth waiting for."

"Goddamit Cordy, quit skirting the issue and just tell me the truth!"

"Okay, you're an asshole."

"Cordy, don't make me come over there and beat you down."

"I told you, Buffy. I'm not interested in sex with you. Faith told me how you like it."

"What?? How I like it? That's how SHE likes it!"

"Sure, Buffy, add that to your many versions of 'Buffy Truths'. Now who's the half-wit?"

"Faith likes it rough, she told me." She did!

"Of course she did, Buffy; and why is that, you think?"

"Are we playing 'Psychology 101' now, Cordy? I took that course, remember?"

"Well, make sure your mom gets her money back, because you failed to learn the basics."

"And that is?"

"One, you're an asshole, two, your head's up it, and three, Faith said she liked it rough because that's the only way you could handle it."

"You better check yourself in, Cordy, because you're insane."

"Really? And what was your pattern, again? Let's see...covering your eyes with your arms if it got too intense, complaining if she wanted sex all the time and then complaining when she didn't, leaving every three weeks when you finally had your fill of paranoia and then...hmm, what was it again? Oh, that's right, then coming back a week later to start it all over...yeah, Buffy, I'm the insane one, lock me up."

"What's with the jacket and earrings?" This conversation has veered way off course.

She's not gonna throw me a Red Herring.

I took Logic & Reasoning too, you know.

She laughs, and then says sarcastically

"Oh god, Buffy, that's priceless. But you wouldn't know that would you? What with your pedestrian knowledge of the finer things in life."

"What's with the jacket and earrings?" I ask for the last time.

"You'll have to ask Faith. But you don't deserve either...OR Faith, I might add, and any half-wit knows it."

And she hangs up the phone.

I'm tempted to call back just so I can hang up on her, but I don't.

Because I need to find Faith.

I'm standing outside of Willy's place and it's closing time.

Faith isn't drinking tonight, or at least she's not now.

Instead, I see her standing by the front door trying to reason with a demon.

A very drunk demon.

"Listen, friend. Willy's is closing now, so that's enough for tonight."

"Arrgggh nrrghfrphh MOOORRREE larggnthhpth!"

"No, I don't think so, buddy. No more 'larggnthhpth' for you, I'm afraid."

The demon takes a swing, but she ducks and then knees him in the groin.

Well, I think it's his groin.

"Sorry about your nuts there, ballsy, but come back tomorrow and we'll set you up with a bowl."

She pats him on the back and then he stumbles off; grumbling, mumbling, and grabbing his private parts.

Which they weren't, by the way. But whatever they were, they were tiny and now pretty much swollen.

Faith may have actually done him a favor.

And apparently Willy has a 'no shirt, no shoes, no service' sign but it says nothing about wearing 'no pants'.

Only in Sunnydale, I tell ya. Only in Sunnydale.

I watch her assist a few more patrons from the bar, dodging her head to avoid sloppy wet kisses and bending back a few fingers from the ones who got fresh.

Well, I think they were fingers.

"Keep your tentacles to yourself there, handsy...and your balls. Unless you want them winding up in your ass like the last demon's testicles."

Faith must be brushing up on her Demon Anatomy. God knows she never learned it in school.

She pats a few more on the back, wishing them well, and then goes back inside and shuts the door behind her.

I hide in the shadows and peer through the window. Willy is behind the bar ringing out the register and counting his money.

"Hey thanks, Slayer. Another night, another undamaged bar. I'm saving tons of money because of you." he says, not looking up.

"About that raise..." And she pulls up a stool.

"What raise? I thought we worked out a deal." He reaches behind him and then puts a bottle in front of Faith.

"What deal?"

"Well, you know...all the booze you can drink and the ass you can kick."

"No, the deal was I bounce for you and you pay me; 6 months I get a raise."

"Has it been 6 months already?" he asks, faking a surprised look.

"God, you're a fucking tightwad, Willy. You just said I saved you a shitload of cash."

"I'll make you a deal...how about we say we give it another 6 months and we'll talk about it then?" he says, pouring a drink for her.

"How about you pay me right now, or I'm outta here?"

"Sure, sure, take the rest of the night off. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Don't fuck with me, Willy. I hate being fucked with." she says, with a steely eye.

"Hey hey hey! Relax, I'm not her, remember?" But he backs up a step anyway.

"Leave her out of this."

"Hey, no problem, you were the one bringing her up."

She keeps staring at him and eventually he counts out some cash.

"Here. For tonight and the next 4 nights, plus a sizeable raise."

She snorts.

"Sizeable my ass. You're lucky I like you."

"Yeah, yeah, don't be going all soft on me. I need me a Slayer not a lover."

She gives him a wink and then pockets the cash. She puts on her denim jacket and heads for the door.

I step out from the shadows and wait for her.

"Lock up behind me, Willy. Unless you're waiting for handsy to come back and play with your-"

She stops before finishing her sentence.

"Hello, Faith."

"Oh, shit..." I hear her mumble, turning back around.

Click. Too late.

"Fuck!" she exclaims, through gritted teeth. She rattles the door.

"Willy, open up, I forgot my jacket!" she says loudly.

And he answers by turning off the lights.

The sudden quiet from the lack of neon humming is deafening.

Just the sound of our short, shallow breaths as we wait for the other to speak.

I decide to go first.

"You're wearing it." I say, softly.

She looks at me awkwardly for a moment and then shifts her eyes away.

"Yeah, well, I always seem to be misplacing them." she mumbles.

"Faith..."

"Look, B. I can't do this anymore. I know it's our pattern to start up after a while, but I just can't this time."

"Faith, I'm not here to get back with you." I say, honestly.

Sorta.

She looks relieved.

She looks relieved??

"Oh, okay. Well, what then? And what are you doing here anyway? Not the best place to be at night if you've got yourself a vagina."

"Well, that would be me. But last time I looked, so did you."

She blushes a little.

It's rare, but when she does, it's really too fucking adorable.

"Yeah, I still have one. What's up, B? A new big bad blow into town?"

"No. Well, maybe, but that's not why I'm here."

She looks at me, waiting for me to finish.

"Look, can we go back to yours? I just wanna talk."

She looks uncomfortable again.

"Or we can go back to mine...you know, so our vaginas can breathe easier." I add quickly.

She hesitates for a moment, looking down at her boots.

I wait there as she thinks it over. She's just looking at her boots...

...looking at her boots, looking at her boots.

She finally looks up at me, warm brown eyes peering through long thick lashes and some hair that has fallen across her face.

"Umm...yeah, alright. I guess that would be okay." she smiles, softly.

And my heart begins racing.

I take her arm and link mine through it, drawing in nearer for warmth.

"But we're just gonna talk, right, B?" Pulling me closer and letting me snuggle.

"Of course, Faith...I swear." Hiding a hand behind my back.

And with two crossed fingers and my heart in her hands, we head back over to...

Ours.

The End